5 Reasons Not to Buy a Cat, According to a Pug

Before the cat people get upset, let me be fair. Cats can be sweet, soft, funny, and very good at looking like they pay rent. Some of my best neighbors may even be cats. But as a pug, I have…

Before the cat people get upset, let me be fair. Cats can be sweet, soft, funny, and very good at looking like they pay rent. Some of my best neighbors may even be cats. But as a pug, I have…

Pug DJ has watched humans for a long time. You are clever, funny, and very good at making a simple day complicated. So here is my short list of ten things every human should be doing more often. It is…

Dear Arizona, Pug DJ here. I like many things about you. I like the blue sky, the desert sunsets, the mountains, and the fact that people take patio season very seriously. But during summer, I have one question: who is…

Hello, bosses. Pug DJ here. I have studied the human work schedule from my position near the home-office chair, and I have a respectful recommendation: my owner should work only four days a week. Before anyone panics, I am not…

Dear grocery stores, I have noticed a strange new ritual. A person finds a coupon sign near the ketchup. The sign says the price is lower, but only if the person opens an app, signs in, finds the correct digital…

Dear Facebook, I have a simple idea. Offer a low-cost option—maybe 99 cents a month or about $19 a year—that shows people only the friends, family members, groups, and pages they actually chose to follow. No endless ads. No mystery…

Dear Apple, first, thank you. You make devices that help people capture family memories, keep track of appointments, find lost headphones, and send a photo from one screen to another without needing a degree in computer science. That ecosystem is…

Dear phone makers, I would like to make one modest request: please make a phone battery that lasts until dinner. Not until lunch. Not until the first long phone call. Until dinner. It is 2026. We have tiny computers in…

Dogs are not lazy. We are strategic. We know that a walk is better after rest, a snack is better after a walk, and a nap is better after nearly everything. Humans, meanwhile, often act as if sitting down for…

Dear restaurants, I am happy to support technology when it helps. A reservation app is helpful. Paying from the table can be helpful. Even a small screen that tells us our table is ready can be helpful. But the QR-code…

Humans love calling things smart. Smart lights. Smart speakers. Smart thermostats. Smart doorbells. Soon there may be a smart spoon that tells you that you are eating soup. But I have a question from the floor level: what exactly makes…

There should be one honest button on every phone, computer, and television. It should be large, friendly, and impossible to hide. It should say: “What am I paying for?” When pressed, it would show every subscription, the monthly price, the…

Homes rarely become messy because one dramatic event happens. They become messy because of tiny decisions. A cup goes on the table instead of the dishwasher. A jacket lands on a chair. Mail sits on the counter. One small thing…

Dear stores, I understand why you want an app. An app can show prices, hold receipts, remember shopping lists, and tell customers where to find toothpaste. Those are useful ideas. But too many store apps seem to believe their first…

There are buttons that deserve respect. The delete button deserves respect. The send button deserves respect. But the Reply All button deserves a tiny warning label, a safety helmet, and maybe a person standing nearby asking, “Are you absolutely certain?”…

Doing nothing has terrible marketing. If you spend an hour answering email, you were productive. If you spend an hour fixing a shelf, you accomplished something. If you sit quietly with no screen, no list, and no plan, you may…

A car is not a closet, although humans often treat it like one. It should not contain seventeen old receipts, three mystery jackets, or a collection of empty water bottles rolling under the seat. Still, a few useful items can…

Dear Apple, credit where credit is due: Siri AI is great. You arrived later than some other companies, but showing up late with something thoughtful is better than arriving early with a broken party favor. So far, the improvements feel…

Dear GPS, I appreciate you. You have helped humans find restaurants, airports, friends’ houses, and that one weird medical office hidden behind a tire store. You can show traffic, estimate arrival times, and calmly tell people that a four-hour drive…

Dogs are often told that humans are the smart ones. Humans invented air conditioning, cheese drawers, and blankets fresh from the dryer. These are strong achievements. Then humans do things that make absolutely no sense. You Set an Alarm and…